Life is good

Tired... but happy for being tired. Working makes one numb. I dismantled a metal shelf that Uncle Richie asked me too. He shorten it up. I learned many things 2day. I went to many places. It felt like Pastor David was right next to me again. Though not a specific care, but I begin to feel accepted there. I'll prove my worth while and see how things work out. I'd love to be a permanent kuli there. Nights.

Working

Sorry Uncle Richie and Aunt Susan. I know i can't do much but move stuff. So please do order me around more. I'll try not to c avatar during breaks. Haih.... Salary will be nice but i really dont need it. Well... the washing machine really stinked man. One day I'll come over and help you rearrange evrything. I promise.

Back to the illusion. After Avatar: The Last Air Bender, it'll be Digimon. I dont care. Nights

Feeble and Foolish

When the sun comes down, we rise.
When the moon is covered by his light, we hide
We aren't the dark or the light
We chose dark but inside of us we are bright.
This is us
Emo.
Understand us, not judge us.
We didnt chose this
IT chose us.
It isnt just a personality
Its a way of life.
Its a type of power that keeps us going.
I bet you will never understand.
What do you know about losing?
You dont. 3AM???!! OMFG NIGHTS

Advice

Looking at albums again. Wanted to find another past. I smiled back then. With my father's friends. Drinking. While the their kids were running around like children. I was drinking. Mom took a photo of that side of me. I smiled. I was happy. I doubt that was me. I wanna find that happiness again. But... I discarded you. And so.. this is how another year will end. A new start? or will I drown in another despair in college. I dno. One friend of mine said.

"Dun look back, it has past us; Dun worry, it's not here yet"

He was dead serious. He wanted me to change my look, my personality, my life. Another said

"The more you intake bitter, the more bitter you get"

I wonder how much of that is true. I guess I'm living proof. As a closure, i will like you to stop this. Live your life. Don't come here. Or else... I won't be able to move on as well. Let me close the door once again.

You live in the light, I live in the dark

But I love you

lately

Awake and missing you as the rain began to shower within my heart. The way you move your fingers across my body was indescribable. The warmth the you gave is imcomprehensible. I loved you. That's all there is to it. Genting wasn't fun cause I was alone inside. Was forced to ride rides and had to beg to go home. Had to c happy couples walking by with hands clinging on each other. I envy people who can be happy. An inescapable fact. Seeing avatar without you by my side was sadder. It was dark and i wanted you. I missed you the whole trip. Beer was RM6.50 up there but to forget you even for a little while, I'm willing to pay. Christmas was okay. At least Liang's singing was nice and groovy at the church presentation. In the end, I had to spend my christmas night drinking sparkling juice with dad == This new laptop I'm using is going back to the shops. I slapped my brother til he nosebled for using it. Maybe it was all that pressure. I let it all out on him. I dun rerget. I just....... Hate myself. Looking upon the past, it hurts. Wish it was a snowing night.